I observe life much more than i live it.

“It is true that we are weak and sick and ugly and quarrelsome but if that is all we ever were, we would millenniums ago have disappeared from the face of the earth.”

You, Me, and the World Outside

Have you seen the world?
They’ve all gone crazy
Just repeating what they’ve heard
On the five o’clock news
Pretending everything is fine
Wearing their brand new shoes
Like death can’t catch us here
And I have come to fear
What lies beyond my door
I give to them what I’ve got
And they ask for more
Don’t they know? You can’t give what you ain’t got
I’m no man, honey, I’m no man at all
The world out there
Is oh so crazy
I can’t begin to think
That we are meant for more
That love could find us
And save us from ourselves
People are so hateful and they don’t know what it means
And here I am pretending
That my hands are clean
I’m no man, honey, I’m no man at all
You see, me
I’m no different
Always chasing what I can’t catch
Always asking why
And coming up empty handed
They are all so strange
But I’m no different
And it’s worse, I can’t change
I’m no man, honey, I’m no man at all
So I won’t answer the call
I know what you’ll say
I know what you’ll say
And I’ve had enough of sorrow for today

Into Ruins

Day is coming
God’s unforgiving sun
And I am the one
I am the one

Who is afraid of the light

I thought I saw you in a passing car
Thought of the wishes we made on the shining stars
I hope your scars are healing up better than mine

And I know it’s me
Who threw it all away
Dying to be free
And now only living to get back
What I let fall into ruins

Your heart was broken
Before my words were spoken
And I can’t forget the sound it made

cjwalker005:

I’m tongue-tied and dizzy, and I can’t keep it to myself…

cjwalker005:

I’m tongue-tied and dizzy, and I can’t keep it to myself…

The Queen of Winter

I said all I cared to say
My words propelled the day
Into tomorrow
Singing that anthem of sorrow
As the flag of surrender
Was waved
And you arrived
Queen of winter

Your heart cold like an abandoned stone
in the river
No amount of truth could justify the lies
But I tried
And still my actions are dictated by a memory

If there is a God, His name is time
And we break our backs for that nickel and dime
He gave so much worth to
I spent it all on you
All for you
Queen of winter

Your heart cold like an abandoned stone
in the river
No amount of truth could justify the lies
But I tried
And still my actions are dictated by a memory

The color is gone, dead leaves covered in snow
The silver when I needed the bell
All the things I wanted to know
You knew but wouldn’t tell
Left me speechless, when it was your time to go
And to see the world with uncovered eyes
All the colors and the light,
I was bitterly warm
You were gone
Queen of winter

My heart cold like an abandoned stone
in the river
No amount of truth could justify the lies
But I tried
And still my actions are dictated by a memory
By you
Queen of winter

First and Only Love

This sunset will be my last, here in this town 

The time for staying has long passed 

So i’ll watch the sun disappear on the edge of all that i know 

Then i’ll pack my things and leave it all behind 

i’m on my way down to the station 

i’ve stopped to say i love you, one last time 

no need to give indication of if you feel the same 

i won’t see you for quite a while 

and that is painful enough 

Should i find no fortune 

It is here i will return 

And i’ll beg you not to keep me waiting 

But if you must, i’ll wait the rest of my life 

If ever you find yourself missing me

Know that my heart was yours once 

And yours it shall remain 

My heart was yours once 

And yours it shall remain 

Lonely Pine

Just outside my door I heard a song I hadn’t thought to see before
It were a dying bird sitting in a lonely pine, singing: ‘the time has come’
And I am frightened but everyone simply hums along
So I went to my mother
Mother, mother please tell me I’m wrong
That the sky isn’t falling and all my time ain’t gone
I feel like a fading star just a-waiting for dawn
To slowly fade away as if I never were
And when I’m sick you always have a cure
She said: I’m sorry son,
We’re all just ships lost at sea and our most desperate plea is to find the shore
A safe place to rest weary bones
Nothing more than a place to call home
And as for the bird, pay him no mind
He doesn’t aim to harm though his words are far from kind
Just keep in step with the steady march of time and one day you will find all things die just the same and soon the tide will come to take you back from where you came
Well Mother I’ll take your word and pray it’s true
For the things I know for certain are few
And I’m stuck in between this mystery and I have no clue
So I’ll cling to anything that claims to get me through
These seemingly never ending days of blue

There has never been a time in which I have been convinced from within myself that I am alive. You see, I have only such a fugitive awareness of things around me that I always feel they were once real and are now fleeting away. I have a constant longing, my dear sir, to catch a glimpse of things as they may have been before they show themselves to me. I feel that they were calm and beautiful. It must be so, for I often hear people talking about them as though they were.